Remember in 2001: A Space Odyssey when the ape-like creatures at the beginning come across that monolith? Imagine, then, a similar scene as I unpacked the mighty behemoth that is The Sussex Razor from Ues Razors. To say I went weak at the knees is an understatement that should have me laughed out of the shaving community. I'll never be able to convey my sense of wonder and awe but I'm going to have a bloody good try, so bear with me.
I mean, in the name of all that's holy, just look at it for a moment.
No, come on. Give it the examination it deserves and requires. Look at that solid brass, CNC-machined head. The edges of it are so sharp you'd barely need a blade in there.
And look at that handle. From this angle it looks a bit like the handle attached to Mjolnir*. It's so pleasingly weighty that I'd happily go into battle against a gang of bounders and cads in some dingy, dockland back alley** with it in my hand.
So look, I need to shave with it and see what happens. I'm expecting great things from The Sussex Razor and will report back as soon as I've got my face into it. Stand by your beds.
* It's not the first time we here at DAVESHAVES have made reference to Mjolnir, the hammer belonging to Thor. And by 'we' I actually mean 'I'.
** You might well wonder exactly why I'd be hanging around a dingy, dockland back-alley in the first place. I don't know why. Maybe I'm like Daredevil or Batman or Batdevil or Dareman or whoever and I get my kicks meting out severe, two-fisted justice to the denizens of the night who prey on the weak and fearful, armed with a brass safety razor handle. I mean, we've all done it, haven't we?